77 HOT SEX TIPS

BACK TO BASICS
 
 
  1. Pop in earplugs.
    It will enhance the sound of your breathing and block out the rest of the world so you can focus solely on your other four senses and enjoying one another’s bodies, says Claire Cavanah, co-author of “Sex Toys 101”.
  2. Assert yourself.
    Women are traditionally more submissive, so switching to a more dominant role can break you out of a sex rut, says Ian Kerner, author of “She Comes First”. You don’t have to don leather and wield a whip; just doing something your partner doesn’t expect of you – like initiating sex as soon as he walks in the door – will make things hotter.
  3. Make out more.
    Take a trip back to junior high for an evening and restrict yourselves to 10 minutes of kissing and over-the-clothes touching only, says Leigh Anderson, author of “Games for Grownups”. Keeping things PG for a set time revs you both up for a more adult encounter, she says.
  4. Lock eyes.
    When aroused, your pupils will dilate, so you can track each other’s level of arousal, says Sharon Moalem, Ph.D., author of “How Sex Works”. It also creates a more intense connection during sex.
  5. Get specific.
    When you ask “Does this feel good?” your partner feels pressured to say “yes” to avoid killing the mood, says Steve Bodansky, coauthor of “The Instant Orgasm”. But if you ask more detailed questions (Faster or slower? To the right or left?), they can give simple, one-word responses – making sex better than just “good”.
  6. Turn on some tunes.
    According to researchers at Massachusetts General Hospital, listening to your favorite music stimulates the same areas of the brain as sex, enhancing your euphoria during the act.
  7. Go back to school.
    Women who have graduate degrees or higher have more orgasms, according to a recent Australian survey.
  8. Pick a fight!
    Healthy debate can be a huge turn-on, says Yvonne K. Fulbright, Ph.D., WH sex advisor and the author of “Touch Me There! A Hands-on Guide to Your Orgasmic Hot Spots”. When you argue, your body reacts as it would during sexual response – your muscles tense, heart rate increases, breathing gets heavier. Part of what makes the sex a!erward so hot is not only the release of the body’s heightened state but this feeling that you’ve conquered your ‘opponent’ in some way.
  9. Nix the marathon.
    A survey of sex therapists concluded that the optimal amount of time for sexual intercourse was 3 to 13 minutes – good news, considering the average Joe only lasts 7.8 minutes. So quit worrying about breaking a record, and spend more time on foreplay. You’ll both enjoy it.
DOCTOR’S ORDERS
  1. Double-check your meds.
    A recent study from the University of California, San Diego found that many drugs, including those used to treat high cholesterol, depression, and anxiety, can reduce sexual pleasure. Talk to your doctor about switching meds or finding an alternative to popping pills.
  2. Use two forms of birth control.
    The Kinsey Institute at Indiana University found women who use a hormonal contraceptive plus condoms report higher overall sexual satisfaction. Researchers believe it’s because when women are less worried about pregnancy or STDs they can relax and enjoy the experience more.
  3. Hit the mat.
    A recent study in ‘The Journal of Sexual Medicine’ found that yogis have better sex. Women in the study who began practicing yoga reported improvements in levels of arousal and desire, as well as better orgasms. Plus, the increased flexibility will come in handy.
  4. Get your Kundalini on.
    This type of yoga focuses on breathing techniques that can actually intensify your orgasm when employed during sex, says Sharon Moalem, Ph.D., author of “How Sex Works”. Practice the ‘long deep breathing’ for two to five minutes daily: Sit cross-legged with your hands on your knees and inhale, filling your lungs but envisioning sending the air to your lower abdomen. Once your lungs are completely full, hold for a moment, press your shoulders back, and expand your chest so you can feel light pressure on your diaphragm. Then slowly let out all the air.
  5. Don’t skip the gym.
    Your regular workout can be just as good for your sex life. A University of British Columbia study found that women who got just 20 minutes of exercise a day had better sex than women who didn’t work out. Now that’s a reason to break a sweat.
  6. Don’t let him skip the gym.
    A recent study from the University of Utah found that obese men have lower levels of testosterone, but when they lose the weight, the hormone levels rise – along with sex drive. Plus, another study from the University of California at Berkeley found that sniffing male sweat elevated the chemical that causes arousal in women for up to a full hour afterward.
FRISKY FOREPLAYS
 
 
  1. Wear stilettos.
    A 2008 study by an Italian doctor found that wearing heels directly works the pleasure muscles linked to orgasm. So much sexier than Kegels.
  2. Send him a hoochymail.
    Text and e-mail are great ways to seduce, but can easily be seen by other people (read: your boss). For safe and secure sexting, go to HoochyMail.com to share your fantasy with your significant other. It’s free.
  3. Get a rolling-pin massage.
    Have him rub some massage oil on a rolling pin and gently run it over your shoulders and back. It will help you unwind from your day so you can be fully present during sex, says Barbara Keesling, Ph.D., author of “The Good Girls’ Guide to Bad Girl Sex”.
  4. Set up a mirror.
    According to research from the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health in Toronto, women are more visual than we thought. Seeing yourself engaged in the act will heighten your arousal.
  5. Skip the happy ending.
    Massage each other’s bodies – and that’s it. Tell each other what feels good, and experience the enjoyment of arousal without the pressure to perform, says Gail Saltz, M.D., author of “The Ripple Effect: How Better Sex Can Lead to a Better Life”. The next time you get busy, you’ll know exactly what turns him on.
  6. Hug for 20 seconds.
    Before you get busy, hold each other in a tight embrace. Hugging raises your level of oxytocin, a bonding hormone you produce naturally, and that will enhance your connection, says Ian Kerner, author of “She Comes First”.
  7. Make an obscene phone call.
    Call your man from another room and talk dirty to him. When you’re not face-to-face, it’s easier to lower your inhibitions about verbalizing whatever naughty thoughts you want to share. And if you call him up or leave a dirty voice mail for him during the second week of your cycle – he won’t be able to resist. According to Australian researchers, men find women’s voices sexier when they’re ovulating.
  8. Sync up your breath.
    When you’re spooning (either during sex or not), have one of you take the lead in breathing; the other person follows so you inhale and exhale together. It increases the intimacy of sex, says Karinna Kittles-Karson, author of “Intimate Wisdom, The Sacred Art of Love”.
  9. Don’t wait until you’re in the mood.
    Recent research suggests women’s arousal is more elicited than selfgenerated, says Sandor Gardos, Ph.D., founder of Mypleasure.com, an online adult toy store. Even if you don’t feel like having sex, you’ll most likely become aroused in the process.

TOYS TO TRY

  1. Stick him up.
    Instead of scarves, try ‘All-Tied Up Bonding Tape’  ($20, bootyparlor.com). It sticks only to itself – not your skin – for painless domination. If your man isn’t sure how he feels about being bound, just slip the opening of an already tied tie over his wrists. That way, he can escape more easily.
  2. Use vibrator during sex.
    The ‘We-vibe’ ($130, babeland.com) is the first vibrator that can be used during intercourse. Inserted into your vagina, the u-shaped device stimulates your clitoris and G-spot simultaneously – and is narrow enough to still allow him entry.
  3. Switch up the beat.
    Try a new toy, such as the ‘Champ’ ($36, bootyparlor.com), so you can thump or pitter-patter your way to an orgasm in addition to getting the usual buzz.
  4. Refrigerate your lube.
    Stash a tube in the fridge. The chill will give it a thrilling sensation when applied.
  5. Use your ‘Finger-vibe’ on him.
    Hold it against his perineum, the space between his anus and testicles, says Pamela Doan, a spokesperson for ‘Babeland’. This will send a buzz to his prostate, a much overlooked erogenous zone.
  6. Use your balance ball.
    That big bouncy ball doesn’t just give crunches an extra punch. Sit on it during oral sex, or experiment with it in dfferent sex positions, Karinna Kittles-Karson, author of “Intimate Wisdom, The Sacred Art of Love”. The options are limitless.
  7. Try a new lube.
    The newest on the market do more than just lubricate – many, such as KY’s ‘Intense’ and Durex’s ‘Play-O’, encourage blood flow to the clitoris to provide warming and tingling sensations.
  8. Use him as a sex toy.
    Without ever letting him enter you, slide up and down against his penis to bring yourself to orgasm.
  9. Use a new toothbrush as a sex toy.
    Experiment with the smooth end to stroke sensitive places, and use the bristles to create a new sensation on your erogenous zones, like the bottoms of your feet or back of your neck.
  10. Go wireless.
    The ‘Crybaby’ ($69, babeland.com) remote-control vibrator can be operated from as far away as 98 feet. Give him the clicker and let him go wild. You’ll discover a whole new meaning for PDA.
 

GET FELT UP

  1. Press on your ovaries.
    When he’s going down on you, have him apply consistent pressure on either side of your navel (a little-known erogoneous zone) – it can boost your orgasm, says Emily Dubberly, coauthor of “The Going Down Guide”.
  2. Create a body-part connection.
    While he’s stroking your clitoris, have your partner stroke another body part (your neck, your breast, your stomach) at the same time. If you do it often enough, eventually just stroking the body part by itself will cause sensations in your clitoris, says Steve Bodansky, co-author of “The Instant Orgasm”.
  3. Unclench.
    Most women tighten all their muscles when they’re about to have an orgasm, says Sandor Gardos, Ph.D., founder of Mypleasure.com, an online adult toy store. If you keep them as relaxed as possible, you’ll go to a higher state of arousal get a bigger orgasm.
  4. Have an aftershock orgasm.
    In Tantra, these are called kriyas, (Sanskrit for action). During sex, have your partner run his hands up your spine and concentrate on bringing the sensations through your body. When things get pleasurable your body should start to shake or quake. The key is to allow it to happen. Most women will begin to shake and stop themselves because they think it’s weird, says Jaiya Hanauer, co-author of “Red Hot Touch”. But if they let it go, it can be an incredibly powerful orgasm.
  5. Have him gently kiss your eyelids.
    The thin skin of the eyelids lacks subcutaneous fat, so the nerve endings are close to the surface. That makes them as sensitive to pleasure as other erotic areas of your body.
  6. Be a sole mate.
    The foot has 7,000 nerve endings, says reflexology expert Michelle Ebbin. Pressing on the hollow areas just under the ankle bones on the inside of both feet is a direct energy channel to the sexual organs. Start gently with slow thumb circles to unleash your partner’s hidden passion.
  7. Play ‘This little piggy’.
    Sucking his big toe is like giving him a mini blowjob, says Sharon Moalem, Ph.D., author of “How Sex Works”. That’s because toes are hardwired to pleasure centers in your brain. If foot funk makes you queasy, wash his feet off as part of foreplay.
  8. Explore your partner’s face.
    Facial skin is incredibly sensitive, so a sensual, sexy exploration of your partner’s face can be very erotic, says Stephanie Buehler, Psy.D., a sex therapist and the director of the ‘Buehler Institute’ in Irvin, California. Use your fingertips, lips, or tongue to get intimate with each other’s faces and create sexual arousal.
  9. Exfoliate.
    Scrub your skin with a loofah before sex to make it more sensitive to touch.
  10. Have him nibble on your neck.
    While stimulating your clitoris, have your guy pay attention to little-known erogenous zones like the side of your neck or the backs of your knees. This can make your orgasm more intense.

NETHER REGIONS

  1. Make your tongue flutter.
    When you’re going down on your man, imagine your tongue as humming bird’s wings on slow speed, says Karinna Kittles-Karson, author of “Intimate Wisdom, The Sacred Art of Love”. Touch the underside of your vibrating tongue gently to the head of his penis occasionally for added stimulation.
  2. Blow hot and cold.
    When you go down on him, have an ice cube and a cup of warm tea nearby. Every few minutes alternate between sucking on the ice and sipping the hot tea. The sensations will drive him wild, says Pamela Doan, a spokesperson for ‘Babeland’.
  3. Help him find the female ‘prostate’.
    This seldom-talked-about body part (technically glands around the urethra that mimic the male prostate and are found in the same area as your G-spot) can reward you with a bigger, more intense orgasm. Have him insert two fingers into your vagina and make a ‘come here’ motion with them. If you feel slight pressure, like the need to pee (the female prostate surrounds the urethra), he’s hit the jackpot, says Sharon Moalem, Ph.D., author of “How Sex Works”.
  4. Find a new use for your ‘Finger-vibe’.
    Hold it against the outside of your cheek when you’re performing oral sex on him, says Pamela Doan, a spokesperson for ‘Babeland’. The sensation will drive him wild.
  5. Get deep.
    You don’t have to be a porn star to be good at oral sex. Just lie on your back with your head tilted slightly backward off the edge of the bed. Let your guy stand on the floor directly behind you and enter your mouth from above. Your throat will naturally open up, making you less likely to gag, says Claire Cavanah, co-author of “Sex Toys 101”.
  6. Use double digits.
    Have him insert two fingers into your vagina and open them up in a V-shape. Making a ‘come here’ motion, like he would for the G-spot, will stimulate the roots of the clitoris inside your vagina and bring on di!erent orgasmic sensations, says Jaiya Hanauer, co-author of “Red Hot Touch”.
  7. Hold him tight.
    Before going down on him, stroke his penis from the tip to the base and hold the skin taut there. This allows the nerve endings to be closer to the surface, making the penis sensitive and oral sex more erotic, says Jaiya Hanauer, co-author of “Red Hot Touch”.
  8. Pump him up.
    Wrap your index finger and thumb around the base of his penis and, without touching the rest of his shaft, alternately squeeze, creating a harder, more intense erection, says Ian Kerner, author of “She Comes First”.

POSITION UPGRADES

  1. Update doggy-style.
    ‘Stepping Tiger’ improves on a classic. To do it, kneel on the edge of the bed and lean forward to place the palms of both hands flat on the floor. This allows your partner to enter you from behind at an angle that better targets your G-spot, says Karinna Kittles-Karson, author of “Intimate Wisdom, The Sacred Art of Love”.
  2. Rearrange the pillows.
    Give old positions a new feel by stacking pillows of varying sizes and shapes under di!erent body parts during the deed. Try putting one or two under your butt during missionary. The elevation will give him a di!erent angle of entry – and hopefully hit you in just the right spot.
  3. Do it CAT-style.
    That’s the Coital Alignment Technique. Think missionary, but instead of holding himself over you with his arms, he’s lying fully on top of you, chest to chest. When he’s inside you, the base of his penis should rub against your clitoris and stay there as you move together – rocking instead of thrusting. This greatly increases the woman’s chance of climaxing, says Tracey Cox, author of “Secrets of a Super Sexpert”.
  4. Find an opening.
    Doorways are the ultimate sex tool, says Tracey Cox, author of “Secrets of a Super Sexpert”. Have your guy lean on the door frame and back up into him – there are plenty of free edges for both of you to grab onto for support.
  5. Order a position how-to manual.
    Invest in a guide like the Kama Sutra. Then put Post-its on the pages you want to try and leave them on your partner’s nightstand for him to see your favorites.
  6. Lean back.
    When you’re on top of him having sex, lean all the way back. It gives him a great view or your torso and also easy access to stimulate your clitoris with his hands, says Sandor Gardos, Ph.D., founder of Mypleasure.com, an online adult toy store.
  7. Get off your knees during doggystyle.
    After he enters you from behind, slowly scooch down until you’re lying flat on your stomach, keeping your legs together, says Sandor Gardos, Ph.D., founder of Mypleasure.com, an online adult toy store. It creates a deep angle and intense G-spot stimulation.
  8. Get your balance.
    Reverse cowgirl is a favorite position for many women, but it can be killer on your quads. Have him sit on a chair so that your legs have room to move, or grab onto a headboard to increase your balance and ease the burden on your thighs. Have a seat. Straddle your man while he sits cross-legged. Instead of moving up and down or back and forth, both of you should move in a circle – you lean back then to the right, he leans back and then to the left. Follow each other and it should look like a dance – and feel amazing, says Karinna Kittles-Karson, author of “Intimate Wisdom, The Sacred Art of Love”.

GAMES TO PLAY

  1. Play dress-up.
    Role-playing can be a big turn-on, says Sharon Moalem, Ph.D., author of “How Sex Works”. Buy him the gear and then send him e-mail instructions when to wear it. Instead of your man coming home from work that night, the hot ‘cable guy’ could show up.
  2. Add a guideline to your pornwatching.
    You can touch him but, he can’t touch you. Then swap roles.
  3. Play hide and seek.
    You hide, he seeks. When he finds you, the prize is getting down and dirty wherever you are. Any kids’ game can be made into a sexy game, says Leigh Anderson, author of “Games for Grownups”.
  4. Fake a sex tape.
    Script your own porn with your guy and act it out in front of a camera – without pressing RECORD. It creates the feeling of exhibitionism without worrying about the evidence, says Ian Kerner, author of “She Comes First”.
  5. Make a yes/no/maybe list.
    With your partner, write down every dirty, far-fetched sexual act you’ve ever heard of and then each person says whether they would, wouldn’t, or might try the act. You may have sexual interests in common that you’ve never explored, says Pamela Doan, a spokesperson for ‘Babeland’.
  6. Have him spank you.
    The occasional love tap may not just be for kinksters. According to scientists at Northern Illinois University, spanking can increase the bond between couples. Plus, women get a boost of testosterone when they are on the receiving end – possibly the body’s way of coping with the ‘stress’ of the situation. Whatever the reason, it translates to a boost in sex drive.
  7. Go bungee jumping together.
    Or rock climbing. Or anything that’s a little bit risky before you jump in the sack. Trying something new or exciting before sex delivers a burst of dopamine, a chemical that activated the pleasure centers in your brain. That carries over to more exciting sex afterward, says Gail Saltz, M.D., author of “The Ripple Effect: How Better Sex Can Lead to a Better Life”.
  8. Point and click.
    Adultsexygames.com has free downloadable games that you can play with your partner. Try ‘Romantic Dares’, where you take turns flipping over virtual cards onscreen with sexy dares for you to complete.

HONEST APHRODISIACS

  1. Have some licorice.
    Loop a piece of licorice around his penis (keep it loose!) Then slowly eat it off of him. Licorice is an aphrodisiac, says Sharon Moalem, Ph.D., author of “How Sex Works”, and it’s considered a stimulant for women.
  2. Edit your underwear drawer.
    Toss the granny panties – when you feel sexy in your underthings, then you’ll act sexier in the bedroom, which leads to – you guessed it – hotter sex, says Barbara Keesling, Ph.D., author of “The Good Girls’ Guide to Bad Girl Sex”.
  3. Break out the wine.
    Researchers at the Santa Maria Nuova Hospital in Italy found that women who consumed one to two glasses of red wine a day had more sexual desire and natural lubrication than those who didn’t.
  4. Get out of the bedroom.
    Most couples have sex in the same place every time, says sex therapist Sandor Gardos, Ph.D., founder of Mypleasure.com, an online adult toy store. Any change in venue – like the hallway or the bathroom – increases the excitement.
  5. Heat things up.
    Capsaicin, the substance in hot peppers that gives them their kick, raises your heart rate and triggers the release of endorphins, giving you a natural high that makes sex that much better, says Sharon Moalem, Ph.D., author of “How Sex Works”.
  6. Combine pumpkin and lavender.
    The purple flower has one of the most arousing scents in the world. Plus, when mixed with the aroma of pumpkin pie, blow flow increases to the penis by 40 percent, according to a study by the ‘Smell and Taste Treatment and Research Foundation’ in Chicago.
  7. Take off your top.
    Forget the blindfold and cover his eyes with the shirt you were wearing. The added bonus of your scent will drive him wild – natural body odor is a huge aphrodisiac, says Sharon Moalem, Ph.D., author of “How Sex Works”.
  8. Use scent to evoke sexy memories.
    Have him wear the cologne he wore on your first date, or bake the first dessert you shared. Smell is incredibly powerful when it comes to memory, says Sharon Moalem, Ph.D., author of “How Sex Works”. You can instantly transport yourselves to the beginning of your relationship – a time when sex was ultra-hot.
  9. Hide his razor.
    A man with a 5 o’clock shadow is a bigger turn-on than one who is clean-shaven, according to a recent study from Northumbria University. Researchers believe that women evolved to subconsciously seek out men with masculine features (like stubble) because in caveman days they were more able to protect them from danger.
 
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